baby rejecting mom after going back to workbaby rejecting mom after going back to work

should i just let her be with whoever she wants to be with? It may not feel like it right this moment but things will get better. Recently, ive had the exact same problem with my 16 month old baby, after i took 3 months off work and back to work a month ago. The comment that bothered me if the grandmother taking over being the mother. I never had this difficulty with my older two children (now 6 and 3) and they both deeply love me and enjoy my company (even though I am the disciplinarian). Feed your milk to your baby. Thank you so much for responding so quickly! I feel like a bad mom. It will all work out, whether you stew or ruminate about any of it.". Being 18 months old, your daughter is in an age where turning out towards the world is a natural development. It is not strange at all that dad is exciting when he appears now and then and it might also be quite natural that she is happy about seeing grandma who she right now spends so much time with. Adjusting to this new life will take time and you can't expect to nail it right out of the gate. However, before it got better I came to a sort of terms with it more or less, though I had bouts of severe depression about it from time to time. and youre doing the right thing. I am so happy that my two main men have such a great relationship, but I want to share in it too! I only leave her for one morning a week and have done this since she was 3 months old. If this has happened to you, you might be sad, worried, and frustrated. First of all STOP acting bad towards your daughter. I dont know what to do. So chin up, head down. If she is with me then she walks a way the moment she hears or sees her grandma. I thought I was doing the best thing for myself and my daughter. I have been feeling so down recently to see that he doesnt seem to recognise me and prefer my mother in law more than me. My wife dismisses my concerns so Im looking for the reassurance online. I am also 6mths pregnant with our third and it is stealing the joy of having another baby. I wish I could be of help to you, but at least know there are other mothers out there who are or who have known the sadness and pain you are experiencing. Well, they dont know each other yet! If he feels scared or sick she is the only person who can comfort him. You can implement routines that only you and your daughter do together, such as an evening bath and bedtime story (if that is something your daughter enjoys). his grandad really does spoil him buying him everything thats going, he has to buy him something no matter where he goes & now grandad has turned round & said he wants money for his birthday so he can buy him & my son something for them both to play with. Its hard to deal with every time and heart-breaking. (My step-sons mom also went crazy during their separation. bottomline she just wanted my husband.I guess having 2get through a c-sect, my gets 2spend more time with our girl. Thank you for letting us know that things got better, it has made all the difference to me. Push her away and put your foot down. It hurts. I mean, she barely gets to see you and she is used to you maybe so she doesnt really know what else to do. Try putting the bottle itself inside a brightly coloured sock or wrap it in some clothing that smells of his mother. (And no chords these evening until your baby is asleep! even though i felt rejected i didnt stop trying to hold her or trying to play with her. Im at the end of the road and i dont know what to do. If you are off balance, she might notice and you thereby reinforce the rejection. I am not working and its just because of her that i am not working. I guess what really hurts my feelings is that when she is home is her dad and then I come home, she could care less. She was a real daddys girl up to about 3 months ago. We laugh all the time! Since about 3 months old she prefers daddy over mommy but now it is to the point where she tells me I dont love you I love my daddy. She pushes me away and wants nothing to do with me. that Im not the only one whos going through something like this. she cries alot wen i pick her back from wrk . I am happy to report that he is now 12 months old and has really come to be much more bonded to me, though again he prefers my partner if hes offered a choice between the two of us. My husband has always told me that I am crazy for thinking that she doesnt love me, but it is to the point where I really need some type of help to help my cope with this issue. Jemma. But now my loving daugher has became a real little terror. It feels like going back to work is a relief, so I can just..get out of her life and let daddy make her happy. It sounds to me as if you really want the best for your son, but that you are to some extent in a vicious circle. Try to reach out to your mom and ask for her help. If this board is any indication it happens quite a bit. Your mom can also try to stir up some excitement around you coming home from school; looking out of the window with your daughter here comes Mommy! She is breastfed but dh has been been Dont have a help in the house because my mil doesnt let me keep one. I think this situation just happens with postpartum mothers and makes a lot of sense. And sure enough, the moment I made an effort to lift my own spirits he naturally was back to being in my arms again. Here are three women on how they felt: Mom 1 shared that during the first pregnancy, she stayed at home for the first nine months. Ive loved him madly ever since and do everything for him. When she comes home from nursery its a whole lot worse, I think its because she has been with other women who are completely fun all of the time. His Aunt told me its just a novelty for him. As mentioned earlier, a new sibling might result in the toddler rejecting the mother situation in most households. Recently my sis in law has come back after her long leave.. my son of 3 years has totally changed seeing his aunt.. since she is at home now, i leave my son with her when i am at work.. this is just a phase. I was very badly rejected by my own mother when I was a child and so I feel the pain of rejection very easily. For many adopted children, it certainly IS different t be adopted. Now we could see how confident our baby girl has turned out 2 be. I dont want this to have any lasting affects on our long term relationship. Now at 10 months old, she treated me with the same fondness and love that she had showed my husband during her early months. Im very concerned about you. A few months ago my fiance lost her job and is at home 24/7. I mean, how could we not be depressed when our babies seem to reject us? Here is a little bit about me and my situation (I am very interested if anyone else can relate to me) I was a bit older when I had my son (33 years old) I had a C-section with complications which meant I couldnt be with my son until 3 hours after his birth. Allow a drip or two go into your baby's mouth, then try to insert the bottle nipple into your baby's mouth. Not that I know who to be cross with anyway.Ive confided in my husband, who looks genuinely sorry for me and even feels a little guilty that he is on the receiving end of all this affection and love. please help me ,because i feel that my son hates me and that destroy me . Understand your employer's leave policy, if you qualify for FMLA, and if any state or local laws impact parental leave. I am not looking to be judgedthere is no other way around this o have to work to pay my mortguage and bills, is anyone in this situation that could offer advice ? I am also the sole breadwinner in my family. I am really shattered. If I feed him, he fusses, straightens. I have always been very close to my 18 month old girl. please help im worried that she might endup hating him. I dont know what to do. I am sure that one day, he will know who his mother is and what she did for him. I just wanted to tell the parents here that this has nothing to do with your work or parenting style. I would really urge you to sit back and think hard on what limits are absolutely necessary for you to set and what you can let go of right now. what can i do to make it better? I often feel that I could leave any day, never to return and my daughter would never notice. A scary thought! I feel like there is something I didnt do or that there is something Im not doing, but know matter what it is , its breaking my heart. On the Internet Viral Reddit Baby Family. You can also make sure your baby finishes one breast before . I know a significant factor in my issues with my son was my inability to bond because of my terrible adjustment to being a mother/post partum depression. My mom says this is wrong and that i should just let her go. A two-year-old is demanding and it is his job to figure out what the world is like, which certainly includes a lot of testing and protesting. Yet our daughter still wants nothing to do with her except when its meal time. I would lay down my life for my son without hesitation. Just feel depressed that my 11-month-old does not want me and prefers my mom all the time its my fault.. due to certain unavoidable circumstances I had to leave her with my parents in my home country for 5 months, and now I am reunited with her (at 10 months)..its been a month with her now.. Ive been trying to bring her around to like me.. she does like me, I spend quite some time with her. I thought I was the only one and something was really wrong with my relationship with my 9 month old daughter. Leaning back while breastfeeding helps slow the flow. in the morning when she wakes up, she doesnt even smile at me anymore. But it is common, normal and it will pass, especially if you can avoid reinforcing it by letting your frustrations shine through to your baby. That is not to say that you dont have a real problem. After a mid year holiday I started a new term and now she seems to pretty much loathe me when I get home and quite frankly it is breaking my heart. I was disconnected from the baby during my whole pregnancy i was very depressed, but the second he was born i instantly fell in love and felt so ashamed that i felt the way i had. And that is actually the key to your bonding. I just want to cry and cry. She cries for her grand mother. And my dad is simply crazy about her. Thats good too; try to see that. I encourage you, because Ive been there, to seek help if youre struggling with depression. Skin contact is great for bonding. In other words, the more gloomy, sad and disengaged you are, the more attracted your children are to their father and his new girlfriend (this also would be absolutely unbearable to me, so all my strength is with you on this). Please help!!!!! A really good book to start with is: The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment. I know he is only 9 months but shouldnt 9 month old babies already recognise their mothers? I breastfeed her and I handle 98% of all care for her. I totally understand that you are thinking about another job, and maybe that isnt such a bad idea over time But until then or if you choose not to, there are a few things you can do. It is common at this age, that babies cry inconsolably if put down or left alone for even just a minute. Consider using an Supplemental Nursing System to supplement. Since leaving home 2 go 2 Asia when our baby was 7 months, our internet routine continued. Help?? I am feeling so rejected and lonely. I work 4 full days a week and am with him without fail 24/7 the other 3. I believe our consistent schedule via the webcam n video call had paid off. in return they are telling me dun seperate them from my child wat can i do . i dun get to spent time with her during weekdays..my husband dun understand me wat i am going through . And one afternoon she suddenly started rejecting me. I have stopped taking leaves when my baby falls sick because my MIL is all that she needs and all that I end up doing is washing the diapers and cleaning the house,cooking. Use this time to get down on the floor and play with her, take a bath together, read her a story, curl up in bed and tell her a bed story or sing to her or do whatever she loves doing. Daycare has unleashed a side of his personality I never would have seen if he was home with me all of the time. The sooner you can move on, stop being angry and try to find ways to co-operate, the better life will be for all of you, and especially for the most important person the baby. Also if I am holding him and she walks by, he struggles to get away from me. Regardless of how strong the bond between your and your daughter is today, and the reasons for the situation, if you continue to love her and spend time with her alone and with other, things will improve. Hello all moms I am glad to know that this may be just a phase I am a 24 year old mom first child. Paula, Stay At Home Mom Rejected By Baby Its meal time her except when its meal time mothers and makes a lot sense... And something was really wrong with my relationship with my 9 month old daughter their mothers us. Meal time struggling with depression will get better spent time with her except when its meal time with. They are telling me dun seperate them from my child wat can do... 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