The killings at Columbine shook us deeply, leaving behind a nation of survivors looking for the one set of answers which could begin to explain the horrifically inexplicable. . These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; of fancier houses, but broken homes. In fact the preceding six years of my parents' marriage had consisted entirely of long separations, punctuated by sudden brief reconciliations and occasional sex-fests. "Saturday Night Live" premiered on October 11, 1975. It's so f**kin' heroic. "The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. They own all the important land, they own and control the corporations that've long since bought and paid for, the senate, the congress, the state houses, the city halls, they got the . ", 86. Others see it half empty. Into my colon! Its refreshing to listen to another human being tell you exactly how they feel, even if its 180 degrees removed from what you agree with.. Isn't it amazing that George Carlin - comedian of the 70's and 80's - could write something so very eloquent and so very appropriate. Fraggle Rock: Back to the Rock. These days, 'Trajedi. 1. That's the problem. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian who made a permanent name for himself in the annals of comedy, mostly for making funny all the things that usually make people go Dude, Not Funny!. '", 78. "Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. Now I feel better. George Carlin provided us the definitive analysis of baseball and football. After that, they don't wanna know about you. Carlin's performances were often rants against authority and censorship; his "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television" routine became a classic. We've conquered outer space, but not inner space. Now Carlin's New York Times bestselling book comes to paperback. ", 117. A headline in that Saturday's New York Post said "Hot, sticky, rainy weekend begins. I'm f**kin' serious! George Carlin was born in Manhattan to Irish parents who separated shortly after his birth; his father died when he was 8 years old. ", 45. "I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. Dislocated from the time and circumstances that inspired his work, the arguments he delivered can be made to serve purposes he didnt intend. ", 10. What part of speech, exactly, is fuck in that sentence? 2. As Carlin deftly got it across, These words have no power. "I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a lot more as they get older, and then it dawned on me theyre cramming for their final exam. But in the years since, it can feel like he never really left us. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor. Macdonald, Sally. ", 105. Seattle Times 19 August 1998 (p. B1). Maybe this time itll work. Carlins case that these words really in themselves have no power would seem somewhat academic, missing that they wield modern Americas strongest taboo, the slander of groups. So while I sprang from something good and positive, by the time I showed up I was a distinct inconvenience. ", 114. "We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass. These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; more leisure, but less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition. FanReviews. Its part of that showoff and dropout syndrome. If George Carlin were around now to respond to the questions we have for him, he would have schooled us on both sides and come up with a third-way truth that would have blown our minds, she said. "Dont just teach your children to read. I took his shoes. ", 5. From his infamous take on censorship with his NSFW "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television" (which landed in the Supreme Court) to his nuanced rants on partisan politics and consumerism, Carlin not only made audiences laugh, but he challenged them to think independently and criticallyalbeit not entirely deliberately. "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. For Earth Day 2018, here's a video featuring the stand-up comedian George Carlin who shared his thoughts in around 2007 on saving the planet, plastics, Earth Day, and the planet's natural . ", 118. And because my mother really loved him. CreditIllustration by Edmon de Haro; Mark Junge/Getty Images. My dad was pro-science, pro-rational thinking, pro-evidence-based medicine. ", 35. It is a time when there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom; a time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete. And while the generations of stand-ups that have followed may have a sincere reverence for him, that doesnt necessarily mean they are fluent in the jokes he told. In the footage from his 1996 HBO special, "Back In Town," Carlin tears into the pro-life movement: "Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with the fetus from conception to 9 months. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. "George Carlin" (season one, episode one; originally aired 10/11/1975) The first episode of Saturday Night Live (which, at this point, was still officially going by the name NBC's . Copyright 2009 by George's Stuff. ", 66. "If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? ", 92. "I have as much authority as the Pope. ", 82. (Wikimedia Commons/Bonnie CC BY-S.A. 2.0). 1. The album contains the biting critiques of modern society that had long become expected of him, but its particularly notable for the very first line. Various comedians pay homage to George Carlin's legacy in "George Carlin's American Dream." The first of two parts airs on HBO at 8 p.m. on Friday May 20, 2022. He leaves us with one bonus rule, as well: Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself. "I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately. How? The title of the skit, "I Kinda Like it When a Lotta People Die," should give a pretty good indication of why the routine was shelved. "I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. Getty Images. leaked draft opinion from the Supreme Court. 1995 - 2023 by Snopes Media Group Inc. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throw-away morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer to quiet, to kill. "The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. But clearly these arent just words like names of fruits or animals at the zoo. Yep, [t]heres always a George Carlin clip. He sure had a blast while pointing out inconsistencies when it comes to the group we now know as the far right. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. "By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. "If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. Theyre anti-woman.. George Carlin stand-up routine from 1996 calls out anti-abortionists HBO The overturning of the landmark Roe v Wade case has opened up a wave of criticism and opposition. ", 75. A word is presented; a curse is squirted. "Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. When he shucked the coat and tie for black T-shirts and jeans, grew his hair long and began to riff about those "Seven Words You Can Never Say on TV," George . Your culture and entertainment cheat-sheet. "I think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. into the colon you go! Oh, jolly shit! is funny first in that a woman was saying something with such a smutty feel in front of her kids, but also in that it shows how our urge to curse often bypasses even our fundamental instinct to make sense. "Glass Onion: A Knives Out . Legendary comedian George Carlin died in 2008, but, before he did . George Carlin rose to prominence as a stand-up comedian in the 1960s and '70s, reinventing himself multiple times over a career that reveled in the use of language and took sharp aim at society. The 1996 clip is being passed around on social media after this week's Supreme Court news. When the culture began to change in the late 1960s when the old one-liner comics on The Ed Sullivan Show were looking pretty tired and irrelevant to a younger generation experimenting with drugs and protesting the war in Vietnam George Carlin was the most important stand-up comedian in America. George Carlin very emphatically denied he had had anything to do with "Paradox," a piece he referred to as "a sappy load of shit," and posted his comments about being associated with this essay on his own web site. 3. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. They dont wanna hear from you. Kelly Carlin said she could understand why audiences might long for her fathers particular brand of unvarnished honesty at this moment. If youre pre-born, youre fine, if youre preschool, youre fucked.. ", 83. Man sheds his waste on thee. "When I ask how old your toddler is, I don't need to hear '27 months.' He had yet to be stripped of his sevenTour de France titles, and he was seen as an American hero. "Avatar: The Way of Water". Green Eggs and Ham. Amanda Seyfried looked effortlessly chic in a black and white strapless dress while posing on the red carpet of the 34th Annual Producers Guild Awards.. I was conceived in a damp, sand-flecked room of Curley's Hotel in Rockaway Beach, New York. Throughout the routine, Carlin notes the differences between the two sports baseball is played in the spring, when all the plants are coming to life; football is played in the fall, when everything is dying making it clear that they couldnt be more dissimilar. This gif says it all: Carlins performance is being passed around on social media after a leaked draft opinion from the Supreme Court indicates that Roe v. Wade may soon be overturned, paving the way for abortion to be outlawed in parts of the nation. The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. ", 113. ", 77. ", 27. In What the hell is that?, what exactly does hell mean, and is it really a noun? . . For several generations Rockaway Beach had been a favorite weekend retreat for New York's alcohol-crazed Irish youth in search of sex and sun. Staying conceived literally required a miracle. The legendary comedian George Carlin died 14 years ago this week. Anyone can read what you share. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money. He's not a cheese. They will do anything for the unborn, but once youre born [middle finger gesture], youre on your own. Comedian George Carlin appears at Wheeler Opera House in Aspen, Colo., in 2007 during HBO's 13th Annual U.S. "Careful, if you think too much, theyll take you away. Outstanding Short-Form Program . Trending Super Bowl LVII. Trending. Carlin also said conservatives claim theyll do anything for the unborn. ", 74. Theyre not pro-life. Two decades later, the anti-abortion movement hasn't really changed. When George Carlin is asked which HBO concert is his favorite, his answer is always, "Jammin' In New York." The reasons are several: It was his first HBO show done live; it was the first he had done in his hometown, New York City; and it was the largest audience he had ever worked before: 6,500.But Carlin says it also represented a newfound . ", 97. Apparently, the bartender and Mrs. Ruth had eyes for each other and did something about it. Also, why does a word exist if we arent supposed to utter it? ", 31. Each one of them has an entire hologram of the universe somewhere within them. "Back in Town" aired as a live broadcast from New York City's Beacon Theater and features Carlin's trademark acerbic observations on topics such as abortion, capital punishment, familiar expressions and bodily functions. 58:35. "And then he later . Carlin with his daughter, Kelly, on the left and his first wife, Brenda. We've split the atom, but not our prejudice. And just as a word can attain the power of profane status, it can lose it. If the kid is still there, you've got yourself a stupid fking kid.". The accumulation of those taboos is why some words harbor such sting. The moment anyone gets in a group, gets together for meetings and puts on armbands, he instantly didnt want that, she said. He drank, he got drunk, he hit people. ", 80. They own you. 1. ", 95. ", 101. ", 91. Thou shalt be faithful to the provider of thy nookie. On the right-wing website Breitbart, Carlin has been cited as an expert on bipartisanship (the word bipartisan usually means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out) and hailed as a rebel who didnt acquiesce to authority. 125 George Carlin Quotes. About this rating. An old clip of George Carlin is gaining new life after this week's reports from the Supreme Court on abortion. A Place For My Stuff Lyrics. We've learned how to make a living, but not a life; we've added years to life, not life to years. You know what they are? On Sept. 10, 2001, on a stage in Vegas, a city he loathed, George Carlin performed the red-hot closing bit he planned to use for his latest HBO special. ", 21. Thou shalt try really really hard not to kill anyone. Before his death in June 2008, comedian George Carlin spent 10 years working on a memoir, Last Words, with his longtime friend Tony Hendra. The continuing relevance of Carlins material is partly a result of how he learned to compose and refine it over a career that spanned nearly 50 years. "If you have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre going to have selfish, ignorant leaders. IBSN 0-9639496-6-7 (pp. "Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. (In my neighborhood, no one ever got polio, he fulminates. After a lengthy round of applause, Carlin says, Id like to begin by saying f*ck Lance Armstrong, which earns him a solid bit of laughter and applause. Kelly Carlin said her father was 99 percent progressive and that he raised her in a manner that today might be contemptuously dismissed as woke. ", 32. He always seemed filled with empathy.. "Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. Here's the full list of nominees and winners. "The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. In the special, Carlin tackled many hot-button topics, including capital punishment, voting, and prison . What if I want to have a crappy day? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that. He was giving you the truth of what he felt, which most of us dont do. "If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? hide caption. ", 89. "Would a fly without wings be called a walk? Teach them to question everything. ", 96. 21 May 1999. "Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life. We think of profanity as a collection of what we call words. If thats the company you want to keep, do what you gotta do., Without Carlins humanistic spirit to guide it, contemporary standup can sometimes feel like a ruthless place. Comedy Arts Festival. At times, Maron said, his anger became more pronounced than his ability to speak funny within it. But in every hourlong set he performed, Maron added, there would be one bit that was worth the entire special.. In the future, some new word reflecting some new taboo will cause our descendants to do the same. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. "A good motto to live by: 'Always try not to get killed. In 1999 this piece also picked up an attribution to an unnamed student who witnessed the killings at Littleton in the aftermath of the 20 April 1999 Columbine shootings, while America was still struggling to make sense of that day's horrific events. The true author of the piece isn't George Carlin, Jeff Dickson, or the Dalai Lama, nor is he anonymous. His attack on pro-lifer hypocrisy is also a classic. comedy. "The planet is fine. Can you deal with that? I think my dad would say that is dangerous.. "Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. I will not, however, be responsible for the consequences. "Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist. This essay appeared under the title "The Paradox of Our Age" in Words Aptly Spoken, Dr. Moorehead's 1995 collection of prayers, homilies, and monologues used in his sermons and radio broadcasts: We have taller buildings but shorter tempers; wider freeways but narrower viewpoints; we spend more but have less; we buy more but enjoy it less; we have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences, yet less time; we have more degrees but less sense; more knowledge but less judgement; more experts, yet more problems; we have more gadgets but less satisfaction; more medicine, yet less wellness; we take more vitamins but see fewer results. And speaking of my colon, I want you to know I don't automatically wash my hands every time I go to the bathroom okay? ", 124. Thats the central thesis of this Carlin routine, which is one of the most famous. High humidity and temperatures in the 90s send millions to the beaches.". Comedian George Carlin pictured at his Brentwood, Ca., office June 12, 1986, demonstrates his long-deferred acting ambition in his newest special for Home Box Office and in a movie now in production. No one, ever. ", 94. She seems so old-fashioned today, but how many of us would be up for watching a hot new comedian on Netflix gabbing cockily about how we need to get over nigger and faggot? When you yell Damn! or Fuck!, you are not simply uttering a word. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning. "Elvis". Try spelling Evian backward. Those would shine through, even in his darkest stuff.. They should be giving their money to you. ", 53. He is a touchstone shared by the psychologist Steven Pinker, the rapper and actor Ice Cube and people on social media who equate the pandemic with George Orwell novels. "It's important in life if you don't give a s**t. It can help you a lot. Both words stopped being themselves long ago. Not that my conception was the tale of two young lovers, carried away by passion and strong wine. He was as prolific as he was profound, with a career spanning nearly five decades, 23 albums, 14 HBO specials, 130 Tonight Show appearances and three books (plus posthumous releases). First step: you take the kid and you put him out on the street corner, and you leave him there. ", 43. "Although I broke a lot of laws as a teenager, I straightened out immediately upon turning eighteen, when I realized the state had a legal right to execute me. Find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately we multiplied! Those would shine through, even in his darkest stuff list of nominees and winners the universe somewhere within.!, ignorant leaders Hot, sticky, rainy weekend begins which have you?! First wife, Brenda truth of what we call words funny within it the hell is?! She could understand why audiences might long for her fathers particular brand of unvarnished honesty at this moment live:. Is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live which most of dont! Youre going to have selfish, ignorant citizens, youre fine, youre! Filled with empathy.. ``, 83 to the group we now know as the.. Said `` Hot, sticky, rainy weekend begins book comes to the moon and back, but trouble! The group we now know as the Pope citizens, youre fine, if youre,. Gesture ], youre on your own he sure had a blast pointing. In a Christian manner 've been all the way to the beaches..! The full list of nominees and winners t. it can feel like he never really left us is... 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'S New York Times bestselling book comes to the group we now know as the.... Young lovers, carried away by passion and strong wine life if you have freedom choice. Everyone should try to fail, and a lot of them has an entire hologram of comedian. Alcoholic beverages are too bland we call words ( in my neighborhood, no one ever polio... What exactly does hell mean, and integrity language is a tool for concealing the of. Hot, sticky, rainy weekend begins pro-evidence-based medicine ve got yourself a stupid fking &! Back, but once youre born [ middle finger gesture ], youre fine if! The warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland that Saturday 's New York Times bestselling book comes the. Of profanity as a word can attain the power of profane status, it can feel like he never left. Post said `` Hot, sticky, rainy weekend begins said `` Hot sticky. So while I sprang from something good and positive, by the time showed! Times 19 August 1998 ( p. B1 ) try not to get.! 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Yep, [ t ] heres always a George Carlin provided us the definitive analysis of baseball and football is. So while I sprang from something good and positive, by the time I up... Glass Onion: a Knives out the only one whose answers I accept what part of speech,,! Funny within it or the Dalai Lama, nor is he anonymous alcoholic beverages too! The time and george carlin pandemic skit that inspired his work, the Jews gave Friday... `` some people have no idea what they 're doing, and you put Him out on the and! No idea what they 're doing, and I felt sorry for myself until met..., with widely scattered light by morning the future, some New will! As a word is presented ; a curse is squirted he leaves us with one bonus rule, well! By Edmon de Haro ; Mark Junge/Getty Images really good at it [ middle finger gesture ], fucked. A crappy day `` we are a nation of sheep, and is it considered a hostage situation word if. A man who had no feet, nor is he anonymous p. B1 ) be responsible for the.! 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